I wouldn't call myself book smart at all... I worked really hard in years 11 and 12 and still only got a mediocre result, and that was only because I took VCE French, which is a markup subject. However, i am good with money and I sure am driven...it might take me a while to figure out what I want in different areas of my life, but when I do I stop at nothing to make sure I get it.
For example I only had not even size A cup breasts when i was 19, maybe because when I went through my anorexia when I was younger I didn't get a period for a long time and so didnt develop fully, or maybe because i was just 'blessed' with mosquito bites for breasts....im talking about not even a handful people! It might be vain and superficial, but i didnt feel like a real woman and felt uncomfortable being so flat chested, so after thinking seriously about implants for a year I decided it was what I wanted, so at the age of 20 I decided that is what I was going to do. My Mum and Dad said that if I really wanted them then I would have to do it all on my own, I would have to do all the research and I would have to pay for them on my own. Well, only after a couple of months I had worked it all out and I went to them with my case. I knew where to go for the surgery and I would get a loan that I would pay off over then next year, which I did.
Another example is I tried university to study as a nurse, but dropped out, then tried health science, but dropped out as well...I think it was a combination of both degrees not actually being what I wanted and because I had a hard time keeping up as i just didnt get the content, so I didn't get the best marks in either exams or assignments. Whatever it was, I was definitely not good at university and never completed a degree. However, at the age of 21 I decided that I wanted a house and to own it completly on my own without any financial assistance from anyone.....By age 24 I owned a 4 bedroom house that I currently rent out.
Thailand was another one of those things that I had decided on and there was no way of stopping me from going there in the January of 2010. Convincing one of my bests friends, JH, that I would plan it all and would make sure it would come in under $3000 for everything including spending money, she was on board...
It was the first time either of us had travelled without our parents before, so as we were leaving our parents were fussing over us, as loving parents do. As they said goodbye to us that morning all worried and nervous we both smile and said see ya later all carefree and excited for our first big trip as adults! Let the dancing, drinking, sunbaking and massages begin!
Everyone knows that travelling with someone you haven't travelled with can be risky when its just two of you, especially for girls! You might want to do different things or both have PMS and be bitchy towards each other....well I am extremely happy to say that there was none of this with JH and I! I know, amazing eh?! We both just went with the flow, had a laugh, relaxed and went site seeing everyday and then partied all night meeting new people, dancing and making absolute fools of ourselves with silly dancing, drunkenly playing board games with new friends and once even befriended the owner of a club and started promoting for the place...until we got bored of it 10 minuets later.
We would always start our nights with a Long Island iced tea and finish it by holding each other up as we walked Bangalore rd to get home.
It got to our second last night of Thailand and we had had enough of going out and felt like staying in, except we pre bought some all you can drinks passes to the night club just in front of our hotel, so we decided we would go there for an hour and then just come back and have an early one. Because we weren't into it we decided to have a Long Island iced tea and get in the mood by dancing really stupid and making ourselves have a laugh. As we were doing some pretty hot 60 and 80s dance moves we both see some guys looking at us laughing.
Well I won't go into what happened next as its not my story to tell....but what I will say is that those boys that were laughing were English and JH ended up being smittened with one of them.....
The next day was a big day for me, I was getting my tattoo! I had thought about it for ages, and doing what I always do, once I had decided I was getting it in Thailand there was no stopping me...not even hepatitis B risk! :S nah, I checked it was a good one ;P.
I decided to get "life is what you make it" because no matter where I am or who I am I can always refer to it. It's also something that got me through my anorexia.... When I was sick I always wished that I had my old life which included heaps of close friends, people loving being around me, enjoying things that other 'normal' people looked forward to like going out with friends or even going on holidays... You see, as much as I wanted to do these things I would be paralysed by the fear of what food would be there and what I would have to eat...so I avoided going to events and pretty much lived as a hermit. However, my turning point was when I hit rock bottom and, as much as i really really hate writing this, i tried to harm myself by taking too many pills... not to commit suicide, but as a cry for help...i was that desperate to stop feeling the way i did and for someone to help me stop just thinking none stop about food and get rid of the emptyness and pain i was feeling...
My parents, friends and siblings were already doing everything they could to help me and were just amazing, but after that horrible experience I realised that no one was going to be able to help me if i didnt help myself, as I was the one getting in my own way of what I wanted and who I wanted to be... It was not anyone else's job to help me, it was only me that could help myself.... Why was food so important that it made me loose everything else? It was at that point I realised I could stay being obsessed about food and having no life or friends, or I could give up the obsession and get my life and friends back... It was up to me because "life is what YOU make it"...
Whoever says tattoos aren't painful is full of shit! I swear I almost squeezed JH's hand off. And a tattoo that was meant to take 45 mins took an hour and a half coz I kept asking him to stop....lets just say that was my first and will be my only tattoo!
However it wasn't just a big day for me, my little JH was off to see the Englishman she met from the night before.... Again not going into someone else's story, let's just say when I saw her eyes glisten with excitement when she met me after her date I knew something special had begun....just a pitty he lived in England, as realistically it could never workout...could it?
My tattoo from Thailand. Meant to be a leafy vine going through the words, but I think the dodgyness adds to the authenticity of the Thailand tattoo ;P
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